It’s Official. Now I Need Usage Guidance

The doctor who drilled into my head just called and confirmed that I have a low grade tumor (grade 2 Astro Cytoma).  Sounds more like an early lunar landing module during the 60’s, but whatever.  Or maybe a car from General Motors from the 70’s that regularly caught on fire, so GM decided to sell them in Central America.  

“Jorge - are you still driving that Astro Cytoma? I thought they recalled all of them.”

It’s considered a “low-grade” tumor.  Being someone who was always worried about grades, I wanted to know if that meant a C, or maybe a D.  But apparently tumor grades go from 1 to 4.  Low grade is 1 or 2.  Oh, more like an AP test.  A low-grade tumor is like taking the full AP class, spending $120 to sign up for the test, not studying enough, and getting a score that does not give you any college credit.

Can you tell the other thing that is going on in the Smith household right now?

I am specifically NOT googling Astro Cytoma until my new doctor appointment this Thursday.  I don’t want to see all the videos of vans in flames.

And now that I can officially use the “I have a brain tumor” line, I will need to figure out parameters. Certainly, you don’t want to throw it out there to get out of things like taking out the garbage, but it does seeem like a useful line in moderation.  Should I limit it to a certain number per month, or maybe just hold it for a few larger situations?  Like totally forgetting a birthday.  Or insulting everyone’s religion.  

I might just have to figure this out through trial and error.  Hey, I have a brain tumor.