Friday, April 8, 2022

Home is Where My SIgned Lease is

 Now that the house has sold (ish), my search for where to live next goes into high gear. Looking at condos, townhomes, and duplexes to rent, and have been finding several in Northwest Hills, where I grew up. Looks like I will go full circle. To be thorough, I've also been checking out apartments. Looked at a massive complex in Mueller, that must have had 25,000 units. Felt very Soviet apartment block. It also was full of young professionals. Nothing against them, but not really my preferred neighbors at this point in my life. I envision a lot of "quiet down! It's 9:30 and I am trying to sleep." I asked the leasing person if the place was mostly young professionals, and she told me, "we have one family." Very diverse. When I asked the same question at other places, I got some variation of this response, "we rent to anyone who qualifies." Oh, a fair housing, non-discrimination thing. I explain that I am not trying to break any laws, just wanted to know if they rent to any black people.

Our amazing realtor has been sending me other listings, and now that the house is mostly sold, will take me to see some. Her list did include one "55+ community." Hell no. So, somewhere between frat house and assisted living - that is my sweet spot. I think I have visited enough apartments to finally rule them out. I have now sent five inquiries that were never returned, and have been stood up twice on appointments. Certainly, it's not a renters' market, but damn, some day you will need tenants, and you will not have Russell Smith to kick around any more! [that may have come from a different sentence, not sure how it got there.] The first place that stood me up was a condo complex. Had an appointment at 1 on Saturday. No one was there. I called and left a message. I emailed them later. I even wrote a note on the back of my business card and stuck it in the door. No one got back to me. It still seemed like a good possibility, so the next Wednesday, I signed up for another tour the next day. I called the next morning to make sure they knew I was coming, and the leasing person sounded annoyed and said, "yes, I have you scheduled."

Awesome, sorry I ever doubted you. Not like nobody was there last time I had an appointment.

But I am a forgiving person. And I need a place to live. So I go to the appointment. They will likely have something close to what I need in a month or two, but can't show me anything right now. Not moving there.

I had set up one final appointment with a complex in NW Hills. They were annoying the other way - sending me two email and two text reminders of my appointment today at 1. Fine. Better than standing me up. But wait.

I arrive at 12:50, and the leasing office has a sign ("out on property. Be back 1:15). OK, my appointment is at 1, but I can wait. It's just my non-valuable CEO time. Or actually, lunch. No worries. 1:20 rolls around. No one.

I shot them a quick e-mail: "Thanks for all the reminders. It helped get me here on time for my appointment with, well, no one." Sent at 1:20. Then I went to a shortened lunch. When I got back to the office, I had two messages from Shannon, the missing apartment person.

1:22 pm "I am so sorry, I am not feeling well and the appointment will need to be rescheduled. Again, I do apologize for any inconvenience this may cause."

1:24 pm "Sorry to see you won't be able to make your previously scheduled appointment. You can reschedule for another time if you'd like here ! We want to make sure you have enough time to take a look around our community and apply to an apartment home ahead of your desired move-in date."

Shannon - even with everything else, if you'd stopped with the "I'm sick" e-mail, I would have been fine with it.  But - then telling me I missed my "previously scheduled appointment" and then professing worry that I won't get to see anything before I move in?  That doesn't quite qualify for a "fuck you" but I do think it qualifies for a "fuck off."  And yes, there is a tonal difference.


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